One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
