is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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