i barfeds in our rink
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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