Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Randomize
