It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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