so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
