I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
