my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize