Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
