does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
