This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize