i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
