is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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