p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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