we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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