school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I understand Curling. That high.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
