I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
