glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
