Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
