peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
are you so shy because you have an std?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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