quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
