Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
