I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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