She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
