Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Randomize
