do herpes really smell.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
