The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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