that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
