Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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