grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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