So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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