Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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