11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
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