you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize