this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize