just come out here and I will go home with you...
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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