Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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