We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
