She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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