I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
