her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The uberlube is also flammable
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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