the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
