I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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