O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
My ass is underappreciated
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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