I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
