Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize
