We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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