I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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