he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
