where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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