My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Randomize
