I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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